“Obviously the Cavs’ loss to Orlando was not what we wanted.”
I wrote that sentence and immediately thought of a passage in Robert Cialdini’s book Influence where he describes a World War II veteran who voluntarily stops speaking. The veteran is placed in a care ward and refuses to speak for 30 years. Then, he happens to hear a radio broadcasting a soccer game between his hometown team and their historical rival. At one point, he leaps up and screams, “You dumb ass! Are you trying to give them the match?” He then sits down and never speaks again.
This veteran was so heavily invested in his local sports team that he broke his self-imposed silence to shout at a deaf radio. The lesson: sports are intensely personal. Isaac Asimov wrote, “What you want to prove is that you are better than the other person. Whomever you root for represents you; and when he wins, you win.” Cialdini believes that we bask in the reflected glory of victory, but when our sports teams fail, we begin to distance ourselves from them. This is reflected in our speech patterns: when our team wins, WE win, but when our team loses, THEY lose. We use words indicating that our sports teams bring victory to us all, but that the losers aren’t us – the losers are separate. Thus, when I wrote that first sentence, I mentally implied that the Cavs, as losers, are separate from the fans and citizens of Cleveland. Similarly, if they’d won, and beat the Lakers, I would be celebrating our victory.
Is it possible that in this loss is the opportunity for greater growth? I think so. Cialdini believes that one of the things we do in basking in reflected glory is avoid looking at our own failures. We now have the opportunity to face defeat and move forward, both as a team, as fans and as a city. At each level, we can now ask ourselves good questions. What is wrong here that we can fix? What can we work on? What can each of us contribute to the greater good? That’s where teamwork comes in, and community spirit, and growth, and betterment. The Cavs can build on this, and move forward; they can watch the tapes, blunt the pain and heal. We citizens can constantly get to work, become better people, eat healthier, exercise, volunteer, better our minds and our city. We can work on supporting the local economy, investing, building wealth here, I spent every other evening in a bar, sipping on soda water and watching televisions; now I can move on and spend my time doing other things, better things.
My heart goes out to the players, who must suffer this defeat harder than any of the fans. I hope that they realize and understand that the majority of us, the fans, still love them and that we will not abandon them. They have to know that we’re still behind them, and that we’re looking forward to next year.